What My Mother Never Told Me
by padfootsprincess02
Summary: What I think shouldve happend last season during,and after the episode "Funk". St. Berry centric. Story is better than Summary promise.
1. Chapter 1

** Summary: **My version of what happened during 'funk' because originally that episode went before 'theatricality'. St. Berry centric. ***disclaimer* **I don't own Glee, because if I did St. Berry would've ended up together and Jon Groff would be a regular.

**Chapter 1: "Funk" Revisited**

**Rachel PoV:**

Kurt, Mercedes, Artie and Tina were all discussing our chances of winning Regionals, I was about to join them when I received a text message from Jesse. It read_ Gather all of New Directions and meet me in the auditorium_. I figured that he wanted to go through our song choices for Regionals so I told the original 'gleeks' (minus Finn)as we are called by our fellow classmates that they needed to see something, and text-ed the others the details. When I arrive with Kurt and the others I see Jesse on stage with Vocal Adrenaline... I was so confused, "Jesse, what are you doing here with them?" He answered that he had transferred back to Caramel High because the team had ignored his superior ideas. I could feel my face fall as I hear his response, as the co-captain I realize that I couldn't let my emotions so to protect the team so I quickly slip my showface back on. After Jesse's speech Vocal Adrenaline sang Another One Bites The Dust by Queen. When they finish Jesse gives this look like _Im sorry _before leaving.

Of course We've all heard of Vocal Adrenaline's tradition to scare off the competition, but we weren't expecting a performance at our school OR the tipi-ing of our choir room... Mr. Schue told us that we had to forget about the prior events and focus on Regionals. The next day Mr Shue had decided that we should work on a 'Funk' number as a way to get us out of our 'funk' from Vocal Adrenaline performance. I was walking to my locker so that I can begin working on my ideas for a funk number when "the incident" occurred...

**Jesse's PoV:**

Today I transferred back to Caramel High, as per Shelby's request last night. Shelby was the closest thing to a mother that I had, so when she had asked me to _befriend _her Rachel, I couldn't refuse. I went to meet my old teammates from Vocal Adrenaline they were apprehensive of my return. They believed that I had betrayed them by changing schools and essentially _sleeping with the enemy. _They had mentioned that Neww Directions had gained popularity among the Show Choir circuit and that it was time for our annual funkification of our "competitors".We set off to WMHS to perform in front of my old revivals? teammates? Either way I was nervous. _I remember when I used to get nervous _ echoed in my mind remembering the first day I met Rachel, I put on my show face and did the number that in the end were hurting not only me but Rachel as well. I let my show face slip for a second so that she can know that I didn't mean to hurt her. However, my teammates had other ideas, they said that they needed to prove my loyalty to them, I figured that they were still upset with my relationship with Rachel, my suspicions were confirmed when they had asked me to call her.

They had said that they wanted me to call her so that we could meet face to face, I assumed it was so that I could break-up with her. After my talk with Shelby, I had made the decision that I _would_ break up with Rachel so that she wouldn't find out my initial motives for dating her. Her eventual relationship with Shelby was more important. What I didn't know was that my 'teammates' had planned to egg Rachel when she entered the parking lot. Every egg that hit her had hit me (metaphorically that is), I couldn't stop them, I thought of Shelby and then of Rachel who told me not even a day ago that her biggest dream was to meet her mother. I thought of the bigger picture, knowing that in not doing anything that I would lose her. Giselle had walked up to me and handed me an egg. _Do it Jesse, are you one of us or not?_ That was the last straw, there was no way, I was looking at Rachel broken, when she spoke up: _Do it. _Mirroring Giselle's words, _break it like you broke my heart._ Realizing that this was what **had to happen **for Rachel to meet her mother I raise my hand, and say my last parting words, holding back tears. _I loved you._...


	2. Chapter 2

** Summary: Theatricality**. Drama, by definition baby... :P ***disclaimer*** I do not own Glee, If I did Jonathon Groff would be a regular and St. Berry would be together for-ev-er...

**Chapter 2: "Theatricality?" No. Just Drama...**

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**Jesse's PoV:**

_I loved you. _Those words echoed in my head for weeks after "the incident" had happened as Haylee called it. Haylee was the only person besides Shelby that I talked to from Vocal Adrenaline. They were the only things that helped me keep my sanity during the weeks before Regionals. I had become what Vocal Adrenaline was known for: a soulless automan. I had put all my focus in the numbers and it had started to affect my work. Shelby had even called on me on it during a rehearsal of our Lady Gaga number we had come up with. "_Where is the emotion?"_ she said, looking at me, _"Funny Girl in E Flat". _As soon as she finished showing us how its done I see Rachel, She is looking right at Shelby, she must have heard her sing because she tells her that she is her daughter in front of everybody. Shelby kicks us all out so that she could talk to Rachel alone. Yeah right like I'm going to leave after everything I have sacrificed for this moment! I hide in the shadows by the doors listening to them discuss what had just happened. It was very strained as to be expected but Shelby did say that she would call Rachel, which left me to believe they left me to believe that they finished on good terms. I go to McKinley a couple of days later hoping to talk to Rachel, I wanted to ask her for another chance. Now that she had her mother maybe she wouldn't hold my indiscretions against me. I went to the choir room to see Rachel but she wasn't in there so I went to the next place I thought she would be: The auditorium. Rachel always went there to sing after Glee ended to perfect her voice or sing about her emotions after a hard day. We spent many days there... I saw Rachel but she wasn't alone. She was talking to Shelby, I did what I did last time and waited by the door listening to what they were saying. I was fuming by the end of the discussion, Shelby had told Rachel that it was a mistake to look for her! To add injury to insult she gave her a cup with her name and _gold stars _stating that it was her thing. Rachel held back her tears and asked her to sing with her.. I couldn't stick around to hear them and went back to my car.. I yelled at the top of my lungs, getting out all my frustration and hurt at the fact that after all that I sacrificed that Rachel wasn't going to get her dream after all. For the first time in a long time, I cried, mourning the relationship I could have had.

**Rachel's PoV:**

I had gone to Caramel High to see Jesse perform, like I have for the past couple of weeks since we broke up, when I see that they are working on Gaga!I of course head back to McKinley and tell them what I learned, what kind of co-captain would I be if I didn't tell them of a potential threat? Mr. Shue was initially upset but then had decided that we had to fight fire with fire. Quinn, Mercedes and I head over to spy on Vocal Adrenaline (for inspirational purposes of course) when we hear their coach Miss Corcoran had begun to sing_"Funny Girl". _As soon as she finished I realize that Miss Corcoran is my mother! I couldn't help it, I started walking to the stage ignoring the hushed yells that my teammates are giving me to return. _Miss Corcoran, Im Rachel Berry Your daughter._ She looked down at me and told her team to leave. I ask her the questions that I've wanted to know all my life did she regret giving me up? Was it hard not to make it? She answered just as I would've. Genetics impact more than I thought. The next day, Quinn and Mercedes told the team. They were all scared that I would "jump ship" as Noah put it. I reassured them that this was not the case. As the day wore on I realized that I really needed a mother. I went back to see my mom after the beanie baby catastrophe , asking for her help making a new Gaga dress for our theatricality assignment. She helped with some hesitance... On day I got a phone call from mother telling me that she wanted to meet me, I told her that she could meet me at school since I was working on my Gaga number ( that and I wasn't sure if my dad's would want to see her) The meeting didn't go the way I had wanted, she told me that it was a mistake to look for me, then she gave me a cup with my name and _gold stars _as a gift so that I would remember her by, which only made me thirstier (sadder). I held back the tears that threatened to come out of my eyes when I asked her to sing with me.. I couldn't think of one at the top of my head so we sang my Gaga song _pokerface_. When she left I grabbed my things, thanked Brad then headed out to my car when I see a Black Range Rover with the license plate that read Voc. Ad. 1 _Jesse._ As if my day couldnt get any worse, I walk over to yell at him when I see that he is crying...

_A.N. Thanks everyone for reading this. Comments would be greatly appreciated, constructive criticisms welcome. Just don't flame me please :)_


	3. Chapter 3

** A.N. #1 Sorry for the ridiculously long wait for this next chapter, I wasn't inspired for the longest time, then my computer pretty much got destroyed and I of course was fully inspired and outlined nearly the whole story... So I plan on updating this fic as often as I can. :D * warning there is some Finchel, but its necessary for the story... Dont hate me!* Special thanks to AmyLeigh88 for her help. You're an inspiration to us St. Berry Authors. Love ya!**

**Journey to Regionals**

**Rachel's POV: **_Jesse is crying?_ I cannot deal with this right now, I have to focus on Regionals! This is all part of Jesse and Shelby's plan to ruin us. I'm going home to practice before my emotions take over. If I want New Directions to win over Vocal Adrenaline I must become like what they are. A Soul-less Automaton. When Mr. Schue decided that we were going to do the Journey Medley, I wasn't sure it was going to be enough but I trust him since he _has_ gotten us this far.  
The day of Regionals we are all on edge after hearing Oral Intensity's ode to the judges. We were next, Finn tells me before we go up to sing that he loves me. I am shocked, I can't do this right now we are about to perform! Naturally, I did what I always do to cope with my emotions, I poured out all my emotions into song. As I sing "Faithfully" to Finn, I cant help but think of Jesse and how he is in the crowd. _Take that!_ I can't help thinking with smug satisfaction. We round out our performance with a mash-up "Anyway you Want" and "Touchin', Lovin', Squeezin'".

We are all excited afterwards when Quinn's water breaks. Everyone is panicking and running around and before my mind has a chance to catch up with my mouth, I hear myself volunteer to stay and wait for the results in case they don't make it on time. I go to the auditorium and listen to Vocal Adrenaline. Jesse, of course, is leading them to a beautiful rendition of "Bohemian Rhapsody". I look a him singing he is conveying Freddie Mercury's pain as though it was his own. He is owning the stage as only he (and I ) could. Memories of us together all seem to rush at me at once. Our first meeting at the music store, our rendezvous at Caramel, the night that I couldn't go through making love to him (he was so painfully understanding offering to sing our feelings) and how could I forget when he vowed to make all my dreams come true. It hurt to see him up there,_ without me_. I get my head out of the clouds just in time to her Jesse sing the last note, something about his eyes, they bore into me as though trying to look into my very being and they are trying to express what? An apology? I don't know what to make of it, but if I look any longer at him I will lose any progress I had made in trying to forget how he has hurt me. The team, minus Quinn and Noah, return just in time to hear the results. We lost. I look at Artie, heartbroken, knowing that this is the end of our club. Finn finds and comforts me and we fall into old patterns because despite the bad, we did have _some_ good moments. Finn was the first boy that noticed me for me. I needed him. I needed to feel loved, so we officially get back together the next week. By some miracle, Mr. Schue tell's us that the Glee club isn't over and that we have one more year to prove ourselves. I am _happy_ for the first time in weeks.

**Jesse's POV:**

After crying the tears that I have been holding since I gave Rachel the tape, really since I had that chat with Shelby in the car, I go back to Caramel to practice because if I'm not going to have Rachel, I'm damn well going to have my fourth consecutive national title. As well as my full ride to UCLA. Shelby was wrong about how it all turned out. I hurt Rachel for nothing. Shelby not only rejected her, but she never told her that what I did was so they could meet, not because I was a spy. She betrayed me. The woman who took me under her wing freshman year and made me who I am today in one fell swoop destroyed three relationships. Our relationship as mentor/mentee, my relationship with Rachel, and what would've been a mother/daughter relationship with Rachel. It kills me everyday, but with Shelby holding my scholarship over my head, I have no choice but to continue with Vocal Adrenaline and get the national title. It is now the day of Regionals, and It's so hard to see Rachel sing "Faithfully" of all songs, to Finn freakin' Hudson. The oaf doesn't compliment her voice, not like I can. I remember like it was yesterday the first time we sang together at that music store, I fell for her right then and there. It hurts to see her with with someone else, especially Finn Hudson. I don't understand what kind of hold he has on her, and fear that I lost her already, not wanting to face my feelings with Rachel during the competition, I exit the auditorium.

When it is our turn to perform, I sing brilliantly as usual. That doesn't mean that I liked what Shelby chose for us to perform. How cruel was it of Andrea to suggest to Shelby that we perform another Queen song? She knew how much it would hurt Rachel. I really shouldn't have excepted any less though, especially being in the show choir circuit as long as I have. Shelby taught us to use control our emotions so that our singing would be authentic but not overpowering. Andrea is emotionless, as most of Vocal Adrenaline. The only friend I have on my "team" was a girl named Hayley, she's my singing companion for most of our numbers. She's the only one who,besides yours truly, sings with emotion. As I sing "Bohemian Rhapsody", I look up and see Rachel in the back of the crowd. I'm overcome with a melancholia that would rival that of Sondheim. I think of Rachel, every moment we have shared over the past few months and it breaks my heart. I try to explain to her how sorry I was as I sing out the last note. I watch as she turns away, tears brimming her eyes. The auditorium door closes behind Rachel, and a couple of seconds later, Hayley brings me back to the performance. The crowd is on its feet, giving us a standing ovation.

We win the title that day. Seeing New Directions not even place was hard. I know what that meant for Rachel. I want to tell her that it doesn't matter. That her talent wouldn't be denied. That she would make it to the Great White Way, but my teammates pulled me in the other direction. A few months later we win Nationals and I'm off to UCLA soon after. I try to forget Rachel but who was I kidding? There's only one Rachel Berry and she's not an easy girl to forget.


	4. Chapter 4

** A.N. #1 Sorry for the wait for this next chapter, I've been busy but I'll try to update ASAP * warning there is some Finchel, but its necessary for the story... Dont hate me!* Special thanks to AmyLeigh88 for her help. Love ya! **

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, If I did St. Berry would not only be endgame but forevergame._ **

"**Audition"**

**Rachel's POV: **The Summer has been wonderful, and the new school year has started. Finn and I are back together and things could not be going better. Matt moved, so we need to recruit new members to compete this year. We sing "Empire State of Mind" during lunch to try to lure new members. Finn notices someone and tries to get him to join. I myself find someone in the restroom of all places! She is Sunshine Corazon, a new student from the Philippines who is an amazing singer. Shes _too _good actually. As soon as I hear her sing I can't fight the urge to join her and show her what Rachel Berry is made of. I put on my show face and sing the next line I tell her that we are looking for new members to sing in the _chorus_, so that she wont get any crazy ideas of getting any solos during glee club.

Finn gets the boy he saw earlier during lunch to audition and we now have a new member of our club, Sam Evans. He is perfectly content with being in the background, which is fine for me. Sunshine asks me about auditions after school and I can't help it, I know its selfish, but I think of my dreams, and I know if Sunshine is in our glee club I won't get as numbers and I need them for NYADA. Glee is my only outlet and I can't have that taken away from me, so I send her to a well known _abandoned _crack-house. Mike and Tina find out and tell the Glee Club. Mr. Schue. gives Sunshine a chance to audition, and she does, however she tells Mr. Schue. that she doesn't feel safe around me and declines. The Glee Club all hate me (except for Finn, but he _is _disappointed). I go to the auditorium and think about everything that has happened in the last year. I think about the relationships I share with everyone in Glee club, how they couldn't understand my drive, my goals, my love of song and theater and then I a thought came to me out of no where, Jesse was the only one who truly understood that side of me because he has those same aspirations. _Wow. _I haven't really thought of Jesse since Regionals. I thought about how he looked that day as he sang "Bohemian Rhapsody" all broken hearted, and another thought had entered my brain, maybe Jesse only did what he needed to do to live out his dreams? I still don't condone what he did because it did hurt but I can understand it, if that were the case. I get to the auditorium and sing "What I Did for Love" from " A Chorus Line" as it expressed my feelings, as I seem to be ruled by them more often than not.

I go to sleep that night and am now consumed with thoughts of Jesse, I dream of him that night, reliving the day that he egged me. I have had this dream before but it is different, before it was more of a nightmare, as I thought of his betrayal and the poor baby chicks that were sacrificed, but now it is more about Jesse and not his actions, I see only his face not the actual act. I also hear his words to me more clearly, the inflections in his voice, the hurt in his eyes. I wake up confused._ Why am I thinking of Jesse? _I rationalize that it just residual guilt over Sunshine and push those thoughts aside. I am with Finn now. I will not cheat on him, he has been so good to me.  
**Jesse's POV:**

After three long months, I finally start school at UCLA and I do what I always do in times of emotional distress, I throw myself into my work. I have met some amazing people. My showchoir professors are incredible and the competition here are talented but nowhere near what it would be in New York. My roommate is a really funny guy named Brent. He is a theater major, so of course we got along famously. Its near the end of my fall quarter when he asks me about my love life, I tell him the truth: I was dating someone but it ended badly and I wasn't ready to date. He says that I was over exaggerating and that I needed to get back out there. I tell him all the gory details. I tell him about Shelby, the egging, and after I'm done he lets out a long whistle and says "that's rough" and suggest that I get back on the field so that I can get over her because "Your like three thousand miles apart, and shes in high school its not like your gonna see her anytime soon." I had to admit it made sense, so I asked out some girls from my classes. What could it hurt?

I go on my first date since Rachel one week later, with a girl named Janice. She was also a freshmen and looked completely different from Rachel. She was tall, blond, with piercing blue eyes that reminded my of ice. She was just as cold. I tried to have fun, I really did, but all that left me with was a hangover the next morning. Brent was laughing at me when I stumbled into our dorm that night, and asked "Guess it was a bust?" That was an understatement. I went on a good share of dates more during the next quarter, all ending in the same fashion, me going home alone. How am I supposed to go get over Rachel when all I do is compare everyone I go out with to her? I have gotten a reputation at UCLA as a "heartbreaker" just as I had in Carmel. Brent keeps telling me that I should use that heartbreak to get girls. "Girls eat that shit up, C'mon Jesse you should know better than anyone that acting stems from your experiences. Use it. You'll be getting girls in no time." "Maybe your right," I conceded. I go out on one last date before Winter Break and lets just say that Brent wasn't totally wrong about girls. Who knew? But I still didn't bring a girl home. "What happened? Didn't my advice work?"asked Brent with a confused look on his face. "Yeah, your advice worked," I said. "A little too well..." I tell him everything, how I told her that I was still hurt over the breakup with Rachel. Then"Total Eclipse of the Heart" came on jukebox causing me to cry. Not my finest moment. Brent was laughing hysterically saying that it was and I quote "Classic". I tell him that the girl had kissed me as she hugged me in an effort to comfort me. "It freaked me out man," I tell him. It was too much to soon. I felt as though I had betrayed Rachel somehow. He tells me that I'm crazy but tells me to give it a couple months more then try again. "Why we are friends?" I ask him. "Because we're both two arrogant sons of bitches who know what they want and go for it, and oh yeah,I kick ass!" I laugh, "That was rhetorical you idiot!"


	5. Chapter 5

**A.N. #1 Sorry for the wait for this next chapter, I've been busy but I'll try to update ASAP * warning there is some Finchel, but its necessary for the story... Dont hate me!* Thanks for all the feedback everyone, you are the best. Love ya! **

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, nor Johnny Rockets. If I did Rachel wouldn't have only applied to NYADA and Jesse would definitely still be in the picture somehow, and I'd be rich lmao. ;)**_

"**Special Education"**

**Rachel's POV: **

So many things have happened in these past few months. I had a Britney phase, I thought it would be a good way to be seen as something other than "crazy Rachel Berry", didn't quite pan out. Finn had an existential crisis after supposedly creating a "grilled cheesus". He soon realized with the hospitalization of Burt that there are bigger things to worry about. I let him go a little further with me than I normally would, hoping that it would get him out of the funk. While he was fondling me I was feeling very awkward , which shocked and surprised me, because when I was with Jesse and even Noah things were so much easier. I never felt like this when with them. I always assumed that when I found the person I was meant to be with, I would be open and our relationship would be simple. With Finn it never is, and that scares me. I decide to take a step back and go back to how things were before. Finn and I are hanging out one day in my room, and we are kissing when Finn tries to try to feel me up again, I pull back and confess that I'm not ready for the next step yet, that I lied about sleeping with Jesse. He has a shocked look on his face, but soon recovers, and go back to kissing before he says he has to go. One week later Kurt announces to us that Carol and Burt are getting married and that they want us to not only be a part of the wedding but also perform. We are ecstatic. We sing "Marry You" by Bruno Mars as we walk down the aisle. The wedding is beautiful. Finn sings to Kurt as a way to apologize for acting so cruel to him while Kurt had a crush on him.

We have little time to dally around after the wedding because sectionals is coming up. Mr. Schue. decides to change up our usual line up and give Sam and Quinn the leads, which is appalling, Sam doesn't even have experience singing in a crowd! How is he supposed to lead us? I start to regret throwing that competition earlier. Mr. Schue. also gives _Santana_ a lead, the girl whose had it in for me since well forever, as well as a dancing solo for Brittany and Michael. I cant help it and make it known that I am not happy with the setlist, and soon find out how bad of an idea it truly was to do that. Santana being Santana corners me one day and tells me that she and Finn were intimate during the time that we were seperated. This infuriated me. Finn the one person, who I counted on the most, lied to me for _months_. I see red. I run into Noah on my way home, blinded by tears. He asks if I want to talk, and I agree. We go over to my house and we are talking and I feel so hurt over Finn's lies that I did something horrible. I cheated on Finn, (well we went as far as kissing, because Noah felt guilty for doing that _again_ to Finn, which was understandable.) While kissing Noah I thought back to the other times I was on this bed kissing a boy, and I realized something, out of all the boys I've kissed I've never felt comfortable with Finn. Noah was "natural" as he called it, and with Jesse there was just no comparison, we were soul-mates in nearly every sense. I miss that connection, it was something that was always missing. I decide to tell Finn about the kiss, and he breaks up with me. It hurt, I'm not going to lie, because he made it seem as though I was the only the only one at fault, when clearly we had both done wrong. I am so upset with myself for what happened with Finn, while still yearning for the connection that I lost when Jesse and I had parted ways that I began to distance myself from the club and even gave up a solo! I spend the next few months working on myself and my dreams of Broadway as a way to distract myself from my woes, as well as a little party to help me become part of my team more. Things didn't go as well as planned...

**Jesse's POV:**

Winter Break wasn't fun at all. I spent the entire time at home in Ohio, in fancy parties with my parents, while they regal their friends with stories of my "successes" at UCLA, and having me perform numbers for them, like a trained monkey. I thought about going to visit my old stomping grounds but decided against it, as all those places were now tainted with memories of Rachel. I couldn't even face my uncle who I usually visited when my parents threw galas like this, because that meant going somewhere close to Rachel, and that was too hard. That winter was too harsh for me and I regretted going back home the moment I stepped onto campus. UCLA was no longer a place of just a school it was my safe haven away from everything that hurt. I will say though that the trip wasn't totally bad, it had revitalized my love of performing. There really was no other place for me than the stage. I always felt at home in front of a crowd and I missed the feeling of seeing people's faces while I sing. My showchoir classes are amazing. I get the lead in the new play that they are doing. Its a play that one of the other students wrote. My first chance to originate a role. Can't wait til I do this in Broadway one day. Brent is in the play with me and naturally we have a great report. We went out to celebrate our success in getting roles in the play, and my life couldn't be better. Well it _could, _but I put that in the back of my mind.

I'm in my room one day nearing the end of the quarter, reading lines, and applying for a job at a local _Johnny Rockets_ among other things, while Brent goes to his math class. Bret gets back from class and starts doing his homework. After a while he stops doing his homework and gives me a quizzical look. "How is it that I never see you doing homework for your other classes Jesse? I know you're a smart but even you can't finish your homework that quickly." I tell him that I haven't really done my homework except for the ones for my theater/showchoir clasess. He tells me that I better watch it because homework is important here and that a low GPA can get me kicked off the play as well as school. I tell him not to worry as I have a way with people and have yet to fail a class. He gives me one more look of disbelief and shrugs as he continues to work furiously on his work. I wonder if I can really get out of anything like I told Bret, but then shook that thought out of my head, and focused on the play...


	6. Chapter 6

** A.N. #1 Sorry for the wait for this next chapter, I've been busy but I'll try to update ASAP * warning there is some Finchel, but its necessary for the story... Dont hate me!* Thanks for all the feedback everyone, you are the best. Love ya! **

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, if I did Rachel wouldn't have only applied to NYADA and Jesse would definitely still be in the picture somehow, and I'd be rich lmao. ;)**_

_**A.N. #2 There is a change or two in this from the SL obviously hopefully it'll make sense.. **_

"**Blame It On the Alcohol"**

**Jesse's POV:**

There's a first time for everything. Today my professor (who also happens to be the head of the department) had requested a meeting with me after class, I thought it was to congratulate my amazing performance in the play; I couldn't have been more wrong. He tells me that my GPA was too low because of the missing homework, and that I wouldn't be able to make it up in time to get the credit for the quarter. He tells me that he wishes there was something that he could do because he believed and I quote that I was " An amazing talent that belongs on stage". Regretfully, that wasn't enough to keep me in school. I was heartbroken. I went to the dorms to pack up my things and get a plan of action for this next stage in my life. As I got to the dorms, I see Brent who just heard the news. "This is Bullshit! You're one of the best performers we've got!" Bret exclaimed as he helped me pack. "No its not, you called it weeks ago", I said in a matter of fact fashion. A thought creep-ed into my brain,_ This is the time to try to make it on my own and get back Rachel. _I decided to get crash at one of my showchoir friends who lived off campus for a while and try my luck out here for a while until I could save enough to go back to Lima to win Rachel back. Together we would go to New York, the mecca of anyone who loved the theater or the arts and conquer it. We would have the epic romance that I had promised her nearly a year ago.

Its a struggle, I'm not going to lie. I didn't get the job at the restaurant that I had applied to before getting kicked out of UCLA. Thank God I had Brett, he had gotten my a gig at a local restaurant/bar as a waiter. It was a small place, but they had karaoke every Sunday, where sing at least once every week in order to keep my voice up and maybe get noticed by someone. All I need is an opportunity to be heard. I get compliments, but nothing ever comes of it. I think of Rachel every night, hoping that soon I would have enough to go see her and make all of our dreams come true...

**Rachel's POV: **

_**2 weeks ago... **_

__ "A party? Really Noah, that's how you plan to help me ' fucking cheer up' "? That doesn't even make sense to me. _I count off my fingers,_ 1) Most of the Cheerio- Gleeks hate so why would they come? 2) I really don't want to see Santana 3) How would it make _me _feel better? Noah explained to me that it would help me loosen up and that I really shouldn't care about the Cheerios because "theyre bitches" and there was nothing I could do about that. He had a point. So I threw a party, I called it the "Rachel Berry Party Extravaganza". It was a fun party. At least it was for everybody besides me. Noah had brought alcohol, I tried not to think how he obtained it, as it was _illegal_. Noah handed me a cup, telling me that it was part of the party experience. I raised my eyebrows at his explanation, but I have learned over the years with Noah that you should never really question his motives, he always tries to do what's right for the people he cares about. I take a sip and asked me how it tasted. "It taste pink!" He laughs and says "have fun Berry!" After a couple more drinks I work up the courage to talk to Finn for the first time since the break up and he insults me. He has the nerve to call me needy! I decide to show him how wrong he was. I tell them everyone that we need to liven up the party with a game of spin the bottle. The bottle landed on me and Blaine, Kurt's crush from Dalton that he invited. We kissed, at first a peck, then after feeling his curly hair coming through my fingers, I was suddenly hit with a rush of memories of Jesse. I hadn't thought about him since that day with Finn, and I couldn't help it, I deepened the kiss with Blaine, thinking of Jesse and how I wished it was him. He reminded me so much of Jesse that when Blaine invited me to go out with him the next day, I couldn't refuse. Kurt was upset with me but I reasoned with him that if he wasn't gay in the long run it would be better for me to date him then for him to be infatuated with someone who wasn't fully committed. We met at the _Lima __Bean _a week after our first date and I kissed him again, to see if I liked him or if I was using him as a replacement for Jesse. I didn't feel anything for him. He, thankfully, felt the same way. I went home that day and wrote a song for Regionals. I thought about Jesse and all the promises that he made to me and how far away that all seemed to me. How he haunted me in my dreams, how he accepted me for me and shared the same dreams that I did. The day of Regionals, I was nervous as I stood there and sang my song.

_Call all your friends_  
_Tell them I'm never coming back  
'Cause this is the end  
Pretend that you want it, don't react_

The damage is done  
The police are coming too slow now  
I would have died

_Call all your friends  
Tell them I'm never coming back  
'Cause this is the end  
Pretend that you want it, don't react_

The damage is done  
The police are coming too slow now  
I would have died

_I would have loved y  
I would have loved you all my life_

You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now

Where have you gone?  
The beach is so cold in winter here  
And where have I gone?  
I wake in Montauk with you near

Remember the day  
'Cause this is what dreams should always be  
I just want to stay  
I just want to keep this dream in me

You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory

Wake up, it's time, little girl, wake up  
All the best of what we've done is yet to come  
Wake up, it's time, little girl, wake up  
Just remember who I am in the morning

You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory

You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory now  
You're losing your memory

The crowd was on their feet after our performance. I was so excited, that I didn't even care that we tied with the Warblers. We all hugged and Finn asked me who the song was about. I told him it was important because we won. I smiled, reveling at the thought that _my_ idea of using original songs have gotten us a ticket to Nationals. I'm already thinking of new songs to sing and looking at my repertoire for Nationals, this is not a time to lose focus, even though most of the Gleeks will with Prom coming up soon...


	7. Chapter 7

** A.N. #1 Sorry for the wait for this next chapter, I've been busy but I'll try to update ASAP * warning there is some Finchel, but its necessary for the story... Don't hate me!* Thanks for all the feedback everyone, you are the best. Love ya! **

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, if I did Rachel wouldn't have only applied to NYADA and Jesse would definitely still be in the picture somehow, and I'd be rich lmao. ;)**_

_**A.N. #2 There is a change or two in this from the SL obviously hopefully it'll make sense.. **_

"**Prom Queen"**

**Jesse's POV:**

Today's the day. I saved enough money to travel back to Lima,Ohio. As soon as I land in Ohio, I take a cab back home, drop off my things, change into proper attire, because you cant look bad when you set out to meet the girl you love, then head straight to McKinley High to look for Rachel. I get to McKinley in no time and head to the one place I knew I could find Rachel. The auditorium, the place where Rachel could express herself completely free of comments from her classmates and tormentors. It was her refuge from the world. As I get closer I could hear her voice singing Adele's angst ridden song of love lost "Rolling In The Deep". Before my brain could catch up to my mouth I belted out the next line. It wasn't the way I had initially decided how I was going to start the conversation with Rachel, but I think it worked out for the best. I had always said to Rachel, that if we couldn't say what we were feeling, we could always sing about it. So there I was pleading to her in song to forgive me for my past indiscretions. I reached out to her but she turned away from me, her face filled with fury, singing back to me with the same fiery spirit. I thought I was a lost cost but kept singing, hoping she would see how much I still loved her. Once the song finished, I was pleasantly surprised to hear her ask me what I was doing in Ohio, in a tone that was a mix of bewilderment and joy. I told her that I had come back for her. She smiled for a half a second before putting back on her show face that I had seen her put up at school. I told her everything, about how Shelby had asked me to befriend her, how somewhere along the way I had fallen in love with her, how Shelby threatened to take away my scholarship if I didn't return to Carmel, and how I never wanted to hit her with the eggs. I apologized profusely about that. I also told her about my misfortune at UCLA. She sympathized but still was wondering why I had come to see her. I told her that I had missed her and never had found someone who understood me quite as she did. I told her about how I longed for her to be part of my life again, in any capacity, so long as she was there. Things became very silent after that so I hastily changed the subject to Prom remembering seeing posters in the halls.

Rachel tells me that she was planning on going with Mercedes and Sam – a new club member who was down on his luck I felt a twinge of jealousy at the mention of another boy but curiosity got the better of me and I asked her what had happened to the oaf that she had called a boyfriend. She gave me a stern look before telling me that it had ended and that he was now dating Quinn Fabray. I was surprised at this news, but was even more surprised when Rachel suggested that I attend prom with the trio, as a trial run to see if we could really be friends. I jumped at the chance... She looks gorgeous while singing and when we danced I was intoxicated by the smell of her perfume. We enjoyed every moment. Up until the oaf ruined it...

**Rachel's POV: **

__Prom. Its a dreaded word for any girl who doesn't have any prospects in line. Everyone at school is in a love-filled spell. It is nauseating. I see I am not the only one feeling this way when Mercedes walks out of glee when Mr. Schue. announces that the club will perform for the event. I catch up to her and layout a plan. I tell her about my idea of inviting Sam to go with us, he was single and willing (after some convincing). I was in the auditorium practicing a song for prom with the help of the Audio-Visual club when I hear a voice that I've recently only heard in my dreams- Jesse St. James. He sang to me how he regretted his actions, and I wanted to forgive him right then and there, but what kind of performer would I be if I did that? After we finish singing he apologies for everything and tells me what had led him to be back in Ohio. I couldn't believe that he was kicked out of school. His talent surpassed anyone (besides myself) that I had heard. He then asked if we can be friends, I stay silent trying to come up with a way to answer him when he asks me about prom. I decide that it is the perfect way to reconcile our relationship and invite him to come along with Mercedes, Sam and I. He agrees.

We have the best time at prom. Jesse is a complete gentlemen. He is nice to both Sam, and Mercedes at dinner. We are dancing and having a blast. I haven't felt so happy in months. When Jesse starts to nibble at my neck I don't stop him. I knew that my happiness was all because of him. I wanted to be closer to him. Finn had to ruin it however by coming up to us and picking a fight with Jesse, I was mortified, not only for myself but for Quinn too. Finn always wants what he can't have, I wish I didn't take so long to realize it. Finn and Jesse got kicked out, and Quinn and I hashed out our feelings. I called Jesse, and told him that if wasn't for the hiccup with Finn the night would've been perfect. I told him that the offer still stood, we would be friends again if that was what he really wanted. We talked for hours, discussing everything from Broadway to school, to his future plans, we had decided that I would talk to Mr. Schue about Jesse helping us out. He was a "Show-choir Whisperer", and face it, we needed him. I hung up and went to bed with a smile on my face, excited for what lay ahead of me. Jesse was back and things couldn't be better...

**AN#3: I know, it was cheesy but I couldn't help it... Reviews are welcome as long as they are constructive.. No flames please. ^.^**


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